Searching for someone who captures your attention is always a little challenging when you’ve been in the dating world a while. In my case it’s been the most of 6 years. Some of us have had enough failed 1st dates to last a lifetime so we search for something that catches our eye.
There he was, the pictures were cute. He wore a hat and had his kids by his side playing at the beach. Of course this is what I see after I get an initial message and have to investigate through his pictures. He likes to spend time with his family, me too! He likes the beach, perfect! Sitting by a campfire, yes!
As we exchanged emails I realized he seemed very down to earth and was very complimentary and had quick wit. He made me laugh and that is vital. I felt comfortable setting up a meet and greet and so we decided the upcoming weekend would be great. This was a weekend I was getting ready to build a new fence so I only had a Saturday morning available. So set up a coffee date right? As we set it up I decided I wanted to stay local and meet at one of my favorite coffee shops, Pines Coffee.
Saturday morning arrives and we are scheduled to meet at 9 AM. I get ready, way overdone for someone who is building a fence for the day but I am still dressed casual. It’s just coffee right?
As I pull into the parking lot, I was hoping I beat him there so I can go in and order. What do I notice as I am getting out of my truck but him getting out of his. We arrived at the same time which was rather nice. I instantly notice him tall, yet stalky with a baseball cap on and a nicely trimmed short beard with a little bit of gray mixed in with his dark hair. While it is not always appropriate to wear a ball cap, I love a guy in a ball cap and I was dressed down too so I didn’t even think twice at how casual we both were. I was excited, he was even more handsome in person!
As he approached me he opens his arms and proceeded to give me one of the best and warmest hugs I have ever had. It totally engulfed me but didn’t squeeze too hard. I was thinking how I could really get used to hugs like that! We went inside and he asked what he could buy me. I gave him my order and sat down in one of the 2 comfy chairs that were close to the door. While he had spoken a little to me he hadn’t been real close except for the hug.
Let me preface the next part by saying in my profile I very clearly lay out several things I am not okay with. First, you must have all your teeth and take care of them, no felons or drug addicts and have a career. Not too much to ask right?
As we started to talk I noticed him talking a little bit with his mouth not very wide. The more he spoke the less he concentrated on his mouth. It didn’t take long to notice his front tooth was completely missing. So as we talked, I would ask about his family. He started with his kids, a teen and pre-teen and he was a proud dad. Although he had concerns as his son was starting to get in trouble and be very defiant and was starting to dabble in drugs. Whoa! I have kids at home so this was not something I was going to be okay with. As he continued, he began to say that he makes good money at his job however he loves to spend frivolously. He talked about how he’d just the day before spent $60 on 2 steaks and how he was excited to grill them. When I questioned him about where he lived he told me that he’d moved in with his dad and he, his dad and his 2 children all lived together. He was a FT single dad because his ex-wife was a drug addict and he started to get more and more intense as he talked about how much he hated her and she was an awful person and a terrible mother who had come in and out of their lives for a while now.
I knew exactly what my profile had stated so I had to find the right opportunity to ask him about his tooth. So when there was a break just after his angry rant about his ex, I pointed to my own front tooth and asked with a puzzled look “so what happened to your tooth?” He looked at me and said “beef jerky accident.” It was all I could do to not bust out laughing. He then decided to tell me how expensive dental implants were. So as he is telling me about the $900 it would cost him to get a new tooth I couldn’t help but belt out “well you just spent $60 on two steaks! Wouldn’t your tooth be a priority?” Seriously I couldn’t help but blurt it out. Of course in a kind way but still making my point heard.
Shortly after that I was able to make my exit, thanking him for the coffee and the conversation but I needed to get home to start my fence. He gave me another of those amazing hugs and said he hoped to see me again soon. Needless to say, that wasn’t going to happen. I don’t have a million rules but clearly when I say that you must have all your teeth, I mean you MUST have all your teeth. Do not waste my time showing up with one of your two front teeth missing and in another breath tell me you’re a frivolous spender. This just doesn’t work for me!
Thanks huggable guy, until never!