“Listen Linda, Listen”
Sex in the Little City
He sold books on Amazon. It was a pretty good job for him and he worked really hard at it. He was a hustler like me. He made good money. He was born in Mexico. He was just a boy when he came over. His mom was a single mother and did the best she could with the kids. ??
When he was little…just 5, he wandered into the field to look at the horse they owned. As he approached from behind the horse was startled and kicked him. It kicked him clear through the barbed wire fence. ? His mother heard the commotion and ran out to find her sons limp body on the ground. Bleeding from every single part of his body she grabbed him and ran to the house. She took whatever clothing she could and wrapped it around the most major cuts. By this time he was conscious and screaming. ?
His mother knew that there was only one bus that came into their village. It only came once a day from the big city that had a hospital. It had already came and went for the day. There was nobody around that could help her or take them and she did not have transportation. So she sat there all night holding her son until the next morning in agony. ? As a mother I couldn’t imagine the heartache. ?
The night that we spent at the hotel and held each other I could feel the scars. As we talked I touched each one of them that I could find on his face, neck and stomach. He said that for all the years that he was married his wife never touched the scars or ever really talked to him about them. It touched his heart. As he told the story tears ran down my face. I couldn’t imagine having that happen to my child. I couldn’t imagine how she felt when there was nothing more that she could do that night as she held him as he cried himself to sleep.
As the days past and the time that we spent together I could definitely tell we had a spark, no doubt about it. But unfortunately my love was for other man. ? Picnicman ?. It was very clear to me now. He had my heart no matter how much I wanted to move on. I just couldn’t quit thinking about him. I know that I was the one that broke up with him and for very good reasons but my heart was still tied to his. He had already moved on to deaden the pain of missing me and I just didn’t want to do the same. ?
It wasn’t fair to any of us. I didn’t feel right about touching anybody else or having anybody touch me. I still felt like somehow I was cheating on him even though I wasn’t.
A few days later I told Alex that I couldn’t see him anymore and that I wanted to just be friends if he was OK with that. He said that he really liked me and wished that we could move forward but he understood the situation that was brewing in my heart. I told him that I didn’t really expect to meet anybody that I really liked on a dating app but that I did a professional blog about dates that kept my mind busy and it was cathartic for me. I just happened to find him along the way. ☺️
He asked me if I was going to write about him. ? I said if you want me to I will but I wasn’t going to. He said, please do. ❤️??? We are still friends to this day and he was just over to see my new apartment. He’s very sweet and we are happy together as friends. He’s an awesome dad and a very respectable man and I’m sure he will find the love of his life. ?? It’s just not me.
Now to find Joaquin aka #picnicman. I knew that if I didn’t try one last time I would regret it for the rest of my life, so I wrote him. ??❤️